Category Archives for People

Sensible Advice from Seasoned Folk to the Class of 2015  

Published in Woonsocket Call on May 17, 2015 — Updated

This month, notable and professionally successful commencement speakers are again gathering at the nation’s Colleges and Universities to give the robed graduating Class of 2015 seniors’ practical tips and advice as to how to have a rewarding personal and professional life.  High profile speakers cam oftentimes translate into big bucks for speaking fees but these widely recognized speakers can bring prestige to the educational institutions.

CNN.web has announced the this year’s high profile speakers for the upcoming commencement season. According to website, like every year these speakers are politicians, journalists, military leaders, entertainers and business CEOs.  Here’s a sampling: President Barack Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama, Oscar winning actors, Anthony Hopkins and Denzel Washington, Novelist and Essayist Author Salmon Rushdie, Bill Nye, the “Science Guy” and Journalist Katie Couric.

May be its time to end the practice of bringing in high-paid commencement speakers.  For this writer, regular folks will do.  Below you might just see many potential commencement speakers, just waiting for the 10 minutes of fame to stand before hundreds of graduating seniors to give their “pearls of wisdom” on living a better life. You may not recognize them on the street, but many in their community know who they are for their achievements of making their Cities and Towns a better place to live.  While not high-profile, through life’s experiences honed every day at work or in their personal worlds, they can give Rhode Island’s college graduates sound, practical advice, to live in a very challenging, and changing world.

Charles Bakst, 71, Providence, retired Providence Journal political columnist. “Stand for something and act upon it.Don’t assume someone else already has done it or will do it.  Work to advance yourself but remember there are plenty of people, even right here in Rhode Island, who have not had the advantages you’ve had. They could use a break too. Help them.”

Dave Barber, 60, East Greenwich, Reporter Capitol Television RI State House. “It’s attitude, not aptitude that will determine your altitude.  There is nothing that will serve you better in the future than a positive mental attitude.  There are two days in life that never exist; yesterday and tomorrow. Yesterday is history, tomorrow a mystery. Live in the moment. Exercise gratitude and kindness in all that you do because there has never been a statue erected of a critic.”

Rick Roth, 61, Cambridge, MA, Owner of Mirror Image.  “Read because if you don’t know anything you are no good to yourself or anybody else and reading is the key to gaining knowledge.  When you are talking (particularly about yourself) you can’t listen. You learn by listening. Try to make the world a better place Pursuit of money is an empty pursuit and will leave you unhappy and dissatisfied.”

Scott A. Davis, 58, Eastside, Owner of the Rhode Island Antique Mall. “In today’s age of information, simply having knowledge is not worth much.  The secret to success in the future will not lie so much in what you know, but in your ability to synthesize information, whether already known or newly acquired, and to draw insightful and valuable conclusions from it.”

Scott Rotondo, 41, Pawtucket, accountant at Tivoli Audio. “Always be willing to expand your intellectual toolbox. Challenge the way things are done, and your own beliefs from time to time. Take in other people’s opposing points of view not with rancor and disdain but with dignity and respect.”

Lisa A. Proctor, 55, East Providence, healer/counselor. “You can not necessarily say all things are possible with God because many do not believe, but I would say a lot of situations we find ourselves in heal when we live honestly, purely, committed and have a merciful and compassionate heart towards others.”

Rudy Cheeks, 65, a musician and columnist of Motif, Providence, “If you can find what you love and make it the center of your life, you’re doing good and will likely be happy.  Whatever you do, “building community” should be an element in your life. Meet your responsibilities (e.g. if you want to create your own family, make sure you are ready for it and committed to it). When you become an “active consumer,” be a smart and thoughtful consumer.”

Kathy Needham, 53, Rumford, Controller, of Pawtucket Times and Woonsocket Call. “Follow this old adage, “Autograph your work with excellence, it is a signature of who you are”.  Take great pride in all you do but always remember to be humble.  Know that success is a personal goal.”

Gayle L. Gifford, 61, Providence, a strategy consultant to nonprofits, “Be an informed citizen of the world.  Read quality news from home and abroad.  Travel. Look. Hear. Participate to create the community you want your children and grandchildren to live in. Hopefully that community is one of justice, peace and inclusion. Don’t work all day in a job that destroys what you value. Play outside.”

Crystal R. Parifitt, 41, Pawtucket, Owner of  FurBabies, a small pet salon. “Live within your means, below if you can…owning the biggest and best is overrated.  Don’t go after financial gain, choose financial stability because in 20 years you will regret the time you spent ‘chasing’ when you should have been living.”

Nancy Thomas, Cranston, President of Tapestry Communications.  “What you have done has largely been expected of you.  Now, what do you expect of yourself!  Find more than one thing you can do.  Pursue your education.  You’re not done.  Read, discuss, have opinions. Let the negative inspire you, and the positive be your lens. And, as it has always been, there is no work as important as that of raising a child.  Find your path to doing well at both.”

Barbara Peters, Newport, former AARP RI Communications Director, “Life is full of successes and disappointments. When we are young we tend to “cry” when the material things we want don’t immediately come our way. Forget the disappointments and concentrate on your successes. Nobody will hand you what you think you deserve.  [Only] hard work, dedication to your craft and sensitivity to the feelings of others will bring the rewards to you that are truly deserved.”

Cheryl Babiec, Pawtucket, Pawtucket School Teacher. “As an old saying goes….’One Man’s Junk is Another Man’s Treasure’ continues to hold true with the test of time. One of my yard sale “finds” had the following inspirational verse (though the author is unknown):‘Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the number of moments that take our breath away.’”

Herb Weiss, LRI ’12 is a Pawtucket writer covering aging, health care and medical issues.  He can be reached at hweissri@aol.com.

 

Ex-Marathoner Shines at Wellness Event

Published in Senior Digest in the May 2015 Issue

The stars were in alignment. Just as the staff of Saint Elizabeth Community was organizing its first 5K run and walk as part of an employee fit to care wellness program, workers discovered that they were caring for an accomplished former marathon runner.

Bill McNulty, a 72-year-old afflicted with Alzheimer’s disease, had 45 marathons races, including two in Australia, under his belt. He was the perfect choice to be named an honorary starter for the nonprofit’s 5K Run-Walk for Wellness at Slater Memorial Park in Pawtucket. The event was organized with assistance from volunteer students from the Career Partnership Center at Roger Williams University in Bristol.

McNulty’s wife, Deborah, 56, shared stories of her husband’s love of marathon racing with staff at the Cornerstone Adult Services Memory Care Center, Warwick, which ultimately led to his participation in the recent wellness event.

McNulty, a Warwick resident, ran in the Boston Marathon 15 times, the New York Marathon twice and the Mount Washington Road Race 26 times. Before the onset of Alzheimer’s, he easily logged 100 miles per week just to relax and keep in shape. Earlier in his life when he lived in North Kingstown, McNulty ran more than nine miles to his job at Brown & Sharpe, also in North Kingstown, regularly stopping along the way to pick up a box of Allie’s donuts.

At the 5K event, McNulty, wearing running pants and an official T-shirt, geared  up for the upcoming race, surrounded by his wife, Debra; his son, Ian; and eight other family members. With a big smile on his face, the former marathon runner was stretching and lip syncing to the song, “Royals” by Lorde, waiting for his run.

Steven J. Horowitz, president and chief executive officer of Saint Elizabeth Community, kicked off the event by welcoming the 200 runners and walkers. By participating in the 3.1 mile race, they came to get in better physical shape and to honor McNulty. Horowitz noted how pleased he was to have Saint Elizabeth’s event added to McNulty’s prestigious list of races.

Richard Kyle, 64, a daily jogger, came to the Saint Elizabeth Community’s event on the invitation of an employee. “It’s unbelievable to me,” the Burrillville resident said of McNulty’s accomplishments.

“I can’t hold a candle to him,” says Kyle, who calculates that he runs about 31 miles a week in the Burrillville area.

McNulty’s obsession with running began while he was a high school student in Warwick, says Ian, who traveled from New Orleans to Pawtucket’s largest park to join his father for the run and celebrate Bill being named honorary starter.

Ian says even in harsh winters, his father would remain committed to running. “While some people had personal trainers to get them in shape to run, dad always had this inner drive,” Ian recalled. “It was something he had to do, and he didn’t over think it. He and his running buddies were tough and dedicated. They would just get up, have a donut and a beer and go run a marathon.”

“Racing can seem like a solitary experience,” says Ian, but over the years that belief would change. Bill began to see running as a community experience, even having a social side to it.

“My father was able to relive his glory days and even see some of his former racing buddies,” Ian said of the Slater Park event. “A lot of changes have taken place since my father was running in his prime. … He knows this event is very special, and that people are here to support him.”

By Herb Weiss, a Pawtucket-based writer who covers aging, health care and medical issues. Reach him at hweissri@aol.com.

This Book Offers an Important Life Leason

Published in Pawtucket Times, January 30, 2015

Sometimes you may just pick up a good book to read, especially during a storm when the Governor’s call for a State of Emergency three days ago because of the blizzard. Yes, being homebound because of bad weather does have its advantages. It gives you time to read books, especially if you still have electricity.

For years, my wife has gently suggested that I read a book, lying on her night stand. She told me that “it’ll help you put life’s priorities in order.” But, I never did, until this week when I finally picked up that nationally acclaimed book, “The Last Lecture” coauthored by Randy Pausch and Jeffrey Zaslow. I quickly devoured the 206 page book, published by Hyperion in 2008, in just one day.

Thoughts of a Dying Professor

Doctors gave Pausch, a 47-year-old father of three, from three to six more months of “good health” when they diagnosed him with pancreatic cancer in August 2007. Just one month later, the dying Carnegie Mellon University (CMU) professor would address a packed auditorium for his afternoon lecture, addressing over 400 students, colleagues and friends. His talk was part of an ongoing CMU lecture series where top academics gave their “final talk”, revealing what really matters to them and the insights gleaned over their life if it was their last opportunity. Sadly, Pausch literally got his last chance.

Pausch was an award-winning professor and researcher, in the Computer Science, Human Computer Interaction, and Design at CMU in Pittsburg, Pennsylvania. He passed away from complications from his disease on July 25, 2008. Zaslow, a columnist for The Wall Street Journal, attended the last lecture, and wrote the story that helped fuel worldwide interest in it.

According to Wikipedia, “The Last Lecture became a New York Times bestseller in 2008, and remained on the prestigious list for 112 weeks, continuing into the summer of 2011. The book [ISBN: 978-1-4013-2325-7] has been translated into 48 languages [including Italian, German, Chinese, Arabic and more] and has sold more than 5 million copies in the United States alone, states the free internet encyclopedia.”

The CMU shot a video (one hour and 16 minutes in length) of Pausch’s last lecture—and soon the footage began spreading across the internet, on You Tube, popping up in tens of thousands of websites. Pausch’s inspirational talk, which has been viewed today by more than 17 million people today on You Tube can now be seen on CMU’s website, at http://www.cmu.edu/randyslecture/. His book and e-book can also be purchased on this website or at any bookstore, including your favorite neighborhood store.

Pausch’s Last Hurrah

Pausch’s lecture, “Really Achieving Your Childhood Dreams” wasn’t about his dying. But, he freely admitted that he would rather have terminal cancer than being hit by a bus and suddenly killed because if he was hit by a sudden accident he would not have time to spend with his family and getting his house in order. He moved from Southern Virginia to Pittsburg so his wife, Jai, and his children could be near family.

Meanwhile, the CMU lecturer humorously begins by noting that while he had cancerous lesions throughout his body, outwardly he looked healthy. At one point, to prove his point, he dropped down to the floor and did push-ups on stage.

Throughout his talk, Pausch reeled off his unique insights gained from his four plus decades of life experience, specifically surmounting the challenges in your life he calls “brick walls.” He says, “Brick walls are there for a reason. They give us a chance to show how badly we want something,” he said. Seize the moment, he adds, because, “time is all you have…and you may find one day that you have less than you think”

One of his dreams was becoming a Disney Imagineer. Three rejection letters and a Dean who attempted to block his efforts were an insurmountable “brick wall.” He ultimately would accomplish that childhood dream. He met William Shatner, won large stuffed animals, floated in zero gravity and even authored an article in the World Book encyclopedia. Although he never played for the NFL, he learned about life from his football coaches in his early school years.

So, while Professor Pausch stresses his talk was about achieving childhood dreams, it’s really about how to lead your life, he admits. “If you live your life the right way, the karma will take care of itself,” he believes. Oftentimes referring to ‘head fake’ throughout the lecture, meaning we tend to gain the most experience or lesson when guised by something else. But, at the lecture’s conclusion, Pausch freely admits the ‘last lecture’ was the biggest head fake of them all – for it wasn’t for those in the room but for his children, all under 7 years old. His talk is sprinkled with things he wants his children to learn and wants them to know about him, including personal stories of his growing up, his courtship with their mother, and ways to succeed in life. So, there are many levels and points Pausch gets across in his lecture, detailed in his bestselling book.

Pausch practiced what he preached, telling the packed auditorium to enjoy life and just have fun, like he did. Live life to the fullest because one never knows when it might be taken away, the terminally ill professor warns, who has just months to live.

Loyalty is important so “dance with the one who brings you,” says Pausch. He quotes Seneca, the Roman philosopher born in 5 B.C., “Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity. With this quote, “Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how was the play?” He reminds us not to focus on the little issues while ignoring the big ones. “We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand,” he says.

Pausch tells a story of his father’s “heroic achievement” for bravery awarded to him by the commanding general of the 7th Infantry Division in War II. The 22 year old solider, like many of the Greatest Generation, never mentioned his bronze star, which he only discovered after his death. It just never came up, stated Pausch, but revealed volumes about the importance of being touted their awards, never revealed to mother.

The CMU Professor would even award the “First Penguin” to students who failed to achieve their goals in his “Building Virtual Worlds” course, even though they took a risk using new technology or ideas in their design. He says this award was for “glorious failure” and “out-of-the-box thinking and using imagination in a daring way.”

The Last Lecture is a great read for those who seek a road map for living a better more productive life. It’s jam-packed with Pausch’s wisdom that will certainly come in handy throughout one’s journey in life especially when you confront the “brick walls” or challenges in your personal and professional careers. Take time to live your dreams to be crossed off your bucket list. Sometimes life can be unexpectedly too short, just like Pausch ultimately found out.